So.. maybe it's unfair to say it's that blatant... but I've certainly felt this way in the past.
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Some Truth
So.. maybe it's unfair to say it's that blatant... but I've certainly felt this way in the past.
Friday, March 23, 2012
Thursday, November 10, 2011
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
168 hours
A recent conversation I had sparked my interest in understanding exactly how much time we have in a week.
Everyweek has 168 hours. Ideally, I spend 52.5 of those sleeping (7 1/2 hours per day), which leaves me with 115.5 hours left.
I also eat eat - averaging .5 hour meal and 3 meals per day, that gives me 10.5 hours per week. If you include preparation time, I could easily add probably add 7 hours per week. So 17.5 hours per week for food.
I work, that's 40 hours per week, 45 when you include drive time.
Showering and general maintenence for the day adds another 7 hours per week (1 hour per day).
So after sleeping, eating, working and showering I would have spent 122 hours, leaving me with 46 hours left to do whatever.
That "whatever" includes spending time with friends, family, running, reading and pursuing my other hobbies and interests.
Most weeks I want more whatever time.
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
My History of Voting
Today is an election day. It's an odd year and chances are that people are much more concerned with what will happen in 2012 than they are about the elections that will take place today.
To be fair I have not always participated in my duty as a citizen. However, in November of 2004 I adamantly checked a box indicating I wanted another four year of Bush Jr. It was my first presidential election that I had voted in and I was proud to be a part of it. I was voting for my candidate of choice because he was an evangelical and pro-life. I'd like to tell you I did a lot of additional research beyond this, but I really didn't.
Two years later (in 2006), I checked a box making it more difficult for gays to have the right to marry in the state of Wisconsin. At the time, I was defending the sanctity of marriage.
That was only 5 short years ago.
It's amazing that my views have changed as dramatically as they have in this short span of time. I see my earlier views as being single minded. The institutions of thought I was involved in gave me the answers and I didn't need explore my own reason. This imposed ignorance to my own capacity for thought is one that eventually left me hollow.
I'm thankful that now my mind is a comfortable place to wander, even if that has made the "answers" more complicated.
It's my hope that my ballot decisions of the future will reflect a broader view and consequentially wind up on the other end of the spectrum.
To be fair I have not always participated in my duty as a citizen. However, in November of 2004 I adamantly checked a box indicating I wanted another four year of Bush Jr. It was my first presidential election that I had voted in and I was proud to be a part of it. I was voting for my candidate of choice because he was an evangelical and pro-life. I'd like to tell you I did a lot of additional research beyond this, but I really didn't.
Two years later (in 2006), I checked a box making it more difficult for gays to have the right to marry in the state of Wisconsin. At the time, I was defending the sanctity of marriage.
That was only 5 short years ago.
It's amazing that my views have changed as dramatically as they have in this short span of time. I see my earlier views as being single minded. The institutions of thought I was involved in gave me the answers and I didn't need explore my own reason. This imposed ignorance to my own capacity for thought is one that eventually left me hollow.
I'm thankful that now my mind is a comfortable place to wander, even if that has made the "answers" more complicated.
It's my hope that my ballot decisions of the future will reflect a broader view and consequentially wind up on the other end of the spectrum.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
My faith or lack there of (part 4)
Previously to discovering the prayer study, I had been cautious about what I exposed myself too. There were a couple podcasts I wouldn't listen to and books I wouldn't read. Not a long list considering what some christians will avoid, but I considered my faith was "fragile" and I wanted for emotional reasons to hold onto it. After the study though, the desire to understand the truth became all to strong and I dove in to reading and listening.
In a sort of last ditch effort I attempted to listen to Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis on Audiobook. The arguments for God struck me as being solid, but not infallible and the arguments for Christianity were non-convincing. I stopped listening when I got to the argument for why men and women were treated differently... because there basically was none. It basically said men and women are different so therefore they are treated different... no further explanation. Why are they different? What about the despairity in treatment? Why are women unable to be clergy? nothing!
I also found a podcast called Reasonable Doubts. This was perhaps the most detrimental to my faith (or most helpful to my skeptical mind - however you want to look at it). They broke down many of the arguments that I had originally accepted to favor Christianity. Including phychological explanations behind what might of caused my "spiritual experience".
As the "research" continued, the Christianity I once knew and accepted as whole was failing to hold up to scrutiny. Even a modified more liberal version of christianity while perhaps tolerable in lifestyle seemed illogical to me.
Eye opening as it was, it was also leaving me a bit empty handed emotionally. What of my community? Much of my life was centered in the christian social network, and I really didn't know where to go. I made a couple of earnest attempts at attending churches that I might be able to tolerate but nothing felt right or stuck. It took time and energy to re-establish my social framework.
So what do I call myself now? Probably the term "atheist" is most appropriate. I find very little reason accept any sort of anthropomorphic "god" notion. However, I also pride myself on being intellectually honest and accept that we can't prove "lack of existence" of anything. If there is a God, he should probably start answering prayers on average if he expects people to believe in him.
I've kept this information largely silent to my friends and family, though some know and I'm sure more have put two and two together. I really struggle revealing my true colors on the issue... doubt and skepticism are not revered in the cultures I came from and most of the time I don't know even how to begin. While I feel like my walk out of faith in christianity was a long process, I'm sure some of my friends will see it as more sudden. I also have felt some sort of desire to protect them from losing their own faith as the process isn't always easy, though some of that sentiment has waned as of late.
This story is mostly complete but I feel it's important to not that I've left out the role that my previous marriage and relationship with my parents may have played in this process. Those are stories in of themselves, and while interesting and relvant, I felt might be a bit of distraction to the original topic. I hope uncover aspects of those stories in future posts. I could have written a book if I had wanted to uncover every detail along the way, so I tried my best to stick to the highpoints.
In a sort of last ditch effort I attempted to listen to Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis on Audiobook. The arguments for God struck me as being solid, but not infallible and the arguments for Christianity were non-convincing. I stopped listening when I got to the argument for why men and women were treated differently... because there basically was none. It basically said men and women are different so therefore they are treated different... no further explanation. Why are they different? What about the despairity in treatment? Why are women unable to be clergy? nothing!
I also found a podcast called Reasonable Doubts. This was perhaps the most detrimental to my faith (or most helpful to my skeptical mind - however you want to look at it). They broke down many of the arguments that I had originally accepted to favor Christianity. Including phychological explanations behind what might of caused my "spiritual experience".
As the "research" continued, the Christianity I once knew and accepted as whole was failing to hold up to scrutiny. Even a modified more liberal version of christianity while perhaps tolerable in lifestyle seemed illogical to me.
Eye opening as it was, it was also leaving me a bit empty handed emotionally. What of my community? Much of my life was centered in the christian social network, and I really didn't know where to go. I made a couple of earnest attempts at attending churches that I might be able to tolerate but nothing felt right or stuck. It took time and energy to re-establish my social framework.
So what do I call myself now? Probably the term "atheist" is most appropriate. I find very little reason accept any sort of anthropomorphic "god" notion. However, I also pride myself on being intellectually honest and accept that we can't prove "lack of existence" of anything. If there is a God, he should probably start answering prayers on average if he expects people to believe in him.
I've kept this information largely silent to my friends and family, though some know and I'm sure more have put two and two together. I really struggle revealing my true colors on the issue... doubt and skepticism are not revered in the cultures I came from and most of the time I don't know even how to begin. While I feel like my walk out of faith in christianity was a long process, I'm sure some of my friends will see it as more sudden. I also have felt some sort of desire to protect them from losing their own faith as the process isn't always easy, though some of that sentiment has waned as of late.
This story is mostly complete but I feel it's important to not that I've left out the role that my previous marriage and relationship with my parents may have played in this process. Those are stories in of themselves, and while interesting and relvant, I felt might be a bit of distraction to the original topic. I hope uncover aspects of those stories in future posts. I could have written a book if I had wanted to uncover every detail along the way, so I tried my best to stick to the highpoints.
Saturday, August 6, 2011
My faith or lack thereof (part 3)
In my desire to find this merger between maintain my faith and feeling comfortable with who I was, I hit a lot of bumps a long the way. My ability to make the decisions was compromised on some level and through a complicated series of events I fell into a crisis (The crisis deserves it's own post, so I'll just leave it at that for now), that shook me up pretty bad. I took on all blame for what happened and I was sick to my stomach, with feelings of pain, regret and general lack of any kind of self-acceptance. I can't really describe to you how bad I felt then, but looking back it probably was similar to some sort of depression. I had just come home from college for holiday break at the time and this didn't help because I felt very alone. There were no classes or distractions to drowned out my negative feelings. Naturally, I sought refuge by attending a new church group. At this church group a woman prayed for me - and, no lies, I experienced this "Epiphany" or existential experience...I know it sounds a little ludicrous but I felt as though a physical burden had been lifted from me and that new life was brought in. At this time, I very much believed that this was God was working through me in a powerful way to reshape my then then fragile belief I had in him.
Naturally, this was a bit of a turning point in my life and I decided to set aside much of what I was considering as doubt and move forward with Christianity. Due to the nature of the experience and the issues I was struggling with at the the time, this turning point didn't just encourage me to continue with Christianity I knew but to redefine it for myself. Basically, I was able to let go of some of the "judgement" and expectation aspects of the faith and attempt to come into my own a little. I slowly walked a way from a ministry I was involved in and I like to say "I dabbled in Catholicism" for a while. Compared to my previous version of Christianity I actually found Catholicism quite accepting and more compatible with science. They would sometimes get together and talk their faiths and there was room in these discussion for people to have different expressed views. I actually found it slightly uncomfortable at the time, but also likable. The group I was involved with was quite welcoming and I even went on a mission trip with them. My "epiphany" happened one short semester before I was done with college, so my contact with the Catholic group diminished when I was done with school.
Post college, I struggled to find myself. I didn't feel at home in my career despite having loved college and my degree program. I continued to look for fulfillment via church groups and Christianity and found a church that was extraordinarily social indeed. They had put a call-out for people to start social groups at the church and I decided to start something I called "coffee-colloquium". The goal was to bring people together to discuss important issues within the Christianity at large and share our unique ideas...it was perhaps a bit reminiscent of my experience in the catholic group. The group had somewhere between poor and no attendance the entire time I hosted it, which was at least a year. While I didn't take it personally; I did take it as a sign that there was marginal room for that type of discussion within the boundaries of church and it made me question my role in "church" as a larger institution.
At this time, my interest in other viewpoints continued to grow. I also felt that a belief that was untested was not worth anything, so I began to consume information in various ways. Most of my "seeking" continued to be done through internal sources, but I found that I was getting more liberal on what I would accept. One book that crossed my path at a Christian book store no less was "I Sold My Soul on Ebay
" by Hemant Mehta. In it, I found myself agreeing with many of his insights and as a result decided to check out his blog. This was at a time was I trying to figure my views out. I would spend an hour listening to NPR and then and then (try to spend) an hour listening to Right-Wing talk radio. I was trying to let all sides have a voice.
For reasons I hope to go into later, I found most of Hemant's blog rather benign. It was interesting and curious, but didn't really strike at my faith. It wasn't until a post about a study where prayer was being shown to be unhelpful via statistically relevant data that I actually "cracked.". Previously, it had been easy to write off many of the scientific claims as biased or wayward... but with my engineering background I knew statistics couldn't lie. The study followed a group of patients and in the cases where prayer was used, the group of patients declined in health (as opposed to increase). I just didn't understand why a god wouldn't heal people on average statistically. Obviously, I understood at this point that he let some people struggle... but why wouldn't he help people via prayer on average. It frustrated me and I couldn't let it go. It drove me to read more and more...
Naturally, this was a bit of a turning point in my life and I decided to set aside much of what I was considering as doubt and move forward with Christianity. Due to the nature of the experience and the issues I was struggling with at the the time, this turning point didn't just encourage me to continue with Christianity I knew but to redefine it for myself. Basically, I was able to let go of some of the "judgement" and expectation aspects of the faith and attempt to come into my own a little. I slowly walked a way from a ministry I was involved in and I like to say "I dabbled in Catholicism" for a while. Compared to my previous version of Christianity I actually found Catholicism quite accepting and more compatible with science. They would sometimes get together and talk their faiths and there was room in these discussion for people to have different expressed views. I actually found it slightly uncomfortable at the time, but also likable. The group I was involved with was quite welcoming and I even went on a mission trip with them. My "epiphany" happened one short semester before I was done with college, so my contact with the Catholic group diminished when I was done with school.
Post college, I struggled to find myself. I didn't feel at home in my career despite having loved college and my degree program. I continued to look for fulfillment via church groups and Christianity and found a church that was extraordinarily social indeed. They had put a call-out for people to start social groups at the church and I decided to start something I called "coffee-colloquium". The goal was to bring people together to discuss important issues within the Christianity at large and share our unique ideas...it was perhaps a bit reminiscent of my experience in the catholic group. The group had somewhere between poor and no attendance the entire time I hosted it, which was at least a year. While I didn't take it personally; I did take it as a sign that there was marginal room for that type of discussion within the boundaries of church and it made me question my role in "church" as a larger institution.
At this time, my interest in other viewpoints continued to grow. I also felt that a belief that was untested was not worth anything, so I began to consume information in various ways. Most of my "seeking" continued to be done through internal sources, but I found that I was getting more liberal on what I would accept. One book that crossed my path at a Christian book store no less was "I Sold My Soul on Ebay
" by Hemant Mehta. In it, I found myself agreeing with many of his insights and as a result decided to check out his blog. This was at a time was I trying to figure my views out. I would spend an hour listening to NPR and then and then (try to spend) an hour listening to Right-Wing talk radio. I was trying to let all sides have a voice. For reasons I hope to go into later, I found most of Hemant's blog rather benign. It was interesting and curious, but didn't really strike at my faith. It wasn't until a post about a study where prayer was being shown to be unhelpful via statistically relevant data that I actually "cracked.". Previously, it had been easy to write off many of the scientific claims as biased or wayward... but with my engineering background I knew statistics couldn't lie. The study followed a group of patients and in the cases where prayer was used, the group of patients declined in health (as opposed to increase). I just didn't understand why a god wouldn't heal people on average statistically. Obviously, I understood at this point that he let some people struggle... but why wouldn't he help people via prayer on average. It frustrated me and I couldn't let it go. It drove me to read more and more...
Saturday, June 11, 2011
My faith or lack thereof (Part 2)
High-school was rife with insecurity and torment. I really never obtained that "good group of girlfriends" and although I had a boyfriend for a time - that didn't fix everything either (of course this isn't surprising). Somehow through this I found "my faith" to be a refuge of sorts. I guess I felt slightly more accepted at church than anywhere else, even though when I reflect on this period of my life - I'm not sure that I was super accepted there either.
It wasn't until the end of my senior year that I really started to question Christianity or anything that believed in to a greater degree. Always having been an analytical, things within the church community often lacked the logical congruency I would have hoped for. The youth group that I was heavily involved with was experiencing some cultural shifts that made everyone uneasy. My opinion at the time was that some people were being treated unfairly and a social hierarchy was being developed within.
However, a couple larger things prompted my later questioning.
1) Access to High-Speed Internet
2) My boyfriend ....
Admit-ably, my boyfriend probably being the larger factor. I started the relationship out of good ol fashioned infatuation and solid dose of rebellion, then throw in insecurity and the internet and well there you have it. More importantly, he ended up being the first person I had met (to my knowledge) who was a liberal and an atheist. I had of course, heard such people existed, and though I wasn't going out of my way to avoid them the vastness of Suburbia kept me pretty well incubated. He blew some of my conventional arguments for faith and politics (I was pretty conservative Republican then too) out of the water. My previously impervious seeming rebuttals now seemed flimsy and this deepened in me a search for "truth" and "answers" unfulfilled by what appeared as a simple belief system. I wouldn't say I lost my faith at this time, far from it, but this experience tore a hole that would need time and some serious stitching to be repaired. As one would assume we were way too different for this relationship to last, but what it left me with was the value of critical thought - a gift some never obtain.
This tear in my faith lead me to do some hard questioning... and at that time I primarily sought answers within the church... I read C.S. Lewis and Lee Strobel... as well as other resources. Though not perfect, their arguments were fairly compelling and I was once again feeling comfortable with my belief system. Though, the patched up tear was still strong within memory.
At this time, I basically elected to participate in Christianity until I could figure out a good reason not to. Assume the positive, until a negative can be proven.
During college I lived a sort of "double life". One where I went to church activities twice a week, volunteered to do power point, got excited about mission trips... and one where I spent time having fun, drinking and running around with people I genuinely enjoyed the company of. They weren't as chaste as my christian friends, and they "didn't go to church", but I felt like I could be myself in this crowd. It's amazing really how separate I kept these two lives. One might argue that I would regret this experience, but in reality I think I need both those lives to learn the lessons I did and become the person I am today, even if it wasn't the most consistent. Eventually though, I had to find "one life" to live. I was pretty confused during this part of my life to say the least... I found myself finding fulfillment in both arenas and not wanting to let go of either. Christianity and my christian friends gave me explanations about the afterlife, "safe fun", and a what I felt was purpose. My other friends gave me a sense of self, a feeling of acceptance and a the sanity of reason (and oh by the way I enjoyed the partying too).
What I wanted was a merger, fun and reason, acceptance of self, but where my "christian faith" could stay intact.
It wasn't until the end of my senior year that I really started to question Christianity or anything that believed in to a greater degree. Always having been an analytical, things within the church community often lacked the logical congruency I would have hoped for. The youth group that I was heavily involved with was experiencing some cultural shifts that made everyone uneasy. My opinion at the time was that some people were being treated unfairly and a social hierarchy was being developed within.
However, a couple larger things prompted my later questioning.
1) Access to High-Speed Internet
2) My boyfriend ....
Admit-ably, my boyfriend probably being the larger factor. I started the relationship out of good ol fashioned infatuation and solid dose of rebellion, then throw in insecurity and the internet and well there you have it. More importantly, he ended up being the first person I had met (to my knowledge) who was a liberal and an atheist. I had of course, heard such people existed, and though I wasn't going out of my way to avoid them the vastness of Suburbia kept me pretty well incubated. He blew some of my conventional arguments for faith and politics (I was pretty conservative Republican then too) out of the water. My previously impervious seeming rebuttals now seemed flimsy and this deepened in me a search for "truth" and "answers" unfulfilled by what appeared as a simple belief system. I wouldn't say I lost my faith at this time, far from it, but this experience tore a hole that would need time and some serious stitching to be repaired. As one would assume we were way too different for this relationship to last, but what it left me with was the value of critical thought - a gift some never obtain.
This tear in my faith lead me to do some hard questioning... and at that time I primarily sought answers within the church... I read C.S. Lewis and Lee Strobel... as well as other resources. Though not perfect, their arguments were fairly compelling and I was once again feeling comfortable with my belief system. Though, the patched up tear was still strong within memory.
At this time, I basically elected to participate in Christianity until I could figure out a good reason not to. Assume the positive, until a negative can be proven.
During college I lived a sort of "double life". One where I went to church activities twice a week, volunteered to do power point, got excited about mission trips... and one where I spent time having fun, drinking and running around with people I genuinely enjoyed the company of. They weren't as chaste as my christian friends, and they "didn't go to church", but I felt like I could be myself in this crowd. It's amazing really how separate I kept these two lives. One might argue that I would regret this experience, but in reality I think I need both those lives to learn the lessons I did and become the person I am today, even if it wasn't the most consistent. Eventually though, I had to find "one life" to live. I was pretty confused during this part of my life to say the least... I found myself finding fulfillment in both arenas and not wanting to let go of either. Christianity and my christian friends gave me explanations about the afterlife, "safe fun", and a what I felt was purpose. My other friends gave me a sense of self, a feeling of acceptance and a the sanity of reason (and oh by the way I enjoyed the partying too).
What I wanted was a merger, fun and reason, acceptance of self, but where my "christian faith" could stay intact.
Friday, June 10, 2011
Blog RE-BOOT
It's been so long since I've graced this blog with my presence that I felt it deserved a re-introduction. In case you are wondering, I've still been blogging away over at: www.foodalyst.com, which I bid you to check out. This blog has been a lot of fun to keep up and allows me to talk about a couple of my primary interests food and running in a unique and fun way that I've really been enjoying the social element. All in all, the experience I've had in creating and semi-maintaining foodalyst has been a blast and I wouldn't change anything about it. However, I've noticed that I am generally more silent when it comes to my worldviews or more controversial opinions. That's okay sometimes, but having an outlet to talk about some of the other topics that interest me is something I would like to have. So here I am - rebooting this blog, ready to unleash my voice - no matter the matter.
Be prepared!
Be prepared!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
In case you don't know?
The big news that is out right now is that Jennifer Knapp is out.(She's a lesbian)
And like many others, I'll be interested to hear the reactions from all corners of the earth as this story continues to materialize.
But it's sad isn't it that this makes such big press.
.... and it's not just this.. . It's Constance from Mississippi, It's Gays trying to get divorced in Texas...
The ignorance is getting old.
And like many others, I'll be interested to hear the reactions from all corners of the earth as this story continues to materialize.
But it's sad isn't it that this makes such big press.
.... and it's not just this.. . It's Constance from Mississippi, It's Gays trying to get divorced in Texas...
The ignorance is getting old.
Friday, April 16, 2010
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
My faith or lack thereof (Part 1)
I have hesitated for sometime to bring up the topic of "my faith" on this blog. Probably because I'm not sure I have one, and I'm not sure I want people to know that.
Unfortunately, the most tangible parts of my religious upbringing have always been the fairly morally dogmatic, so I've often wondered if things had been different would that have affected the final outcome. Even though, my questioning on a theological sense began well before I ever questioned the practices.
My initial concern about belief started when I was quite young, I didn't understand the concept of the sinner's prayer. We were taught in church that if we confessed our love to Jesus, then we would be saved (from hell that is). Clearly, I wanted to be saved, hell had already been imprinted on my mind as a terrible place. However, it did not make sense that this prayer could work. I would ask my dad questions like "Is that it?", "Which way do I say it?". So much emphasis was on this prayer that I had to do it right. Consequently, I prayed it many times in many ways throughout my growing up years, just to be sure. In the end I think I was looking for some sort of confirmation like a big shining light from above showing me the truth. People at church would share such stories, but I never experienced it.
Sometimes when I was young I would lay awake at night, wondering if the whole thing was made up. Perhaps there was nothing in the afterlife, or worse yet one of the other religions is true and we are all going to hell. I worried about all the people that hadn't said the prayer right - "What was their fate?", and "How many sins was too many sins?" I never knew if I was okay. I would explain some of these thoughts to my parents and they were always willing to provide me with a helpful resource. At this point, I became introduced to the world of apologetics. One of the first books I read was Dinosaurs and the Bible
. Keep in mind here I was no more than 12. I read other books too, as well as exploring many other resources. I was also exposed to Church camps, and retreats and many other fun and truly dynamic experiences.
All of these experiences were wonderful to me, and as I became more and more involved those experiences the seeds of doubt began to erode. I made a decision when I was 14 to say no more doubt or missteps I am going to be a Christian for always!.... and for the most part this was the end of my questioning.
Until I graduated from high school and....
Sometimes when I was young I would lay awake at night, wondering if the whole thing was made up. Perhaps there was nothing in the afterlife, or worse yet one of the other religions is true and we are all going to hell. I worried about all the people that hadn't said the prayer right - "What was their fate?", and "How many sins was too many sins?" I never knew if I was okay. I would explain some of these thoughts to my parents and they were always willing to provide me with a helpful resource. At this point, I became introduced to the world of apologetics. One of the first books I read was Dinosaurs and the Bible
. Keep in mind here I was no more than 12. I read other books too, as well as exploring many other resources. I was also exposed to Church camps, and retreats and many other fun and truly dynamic experiences.All of these experiences were wonderful to me, and as I became more and more involved those experiences the seeds of doubt began to erode. I made a decision when I was 14 to say no more doubt or missteps I am going to be a Christian for always!.... and for the most part this was the end of my questioning.
Until I graduated from high school and....
Friday, April 2, 2010
CASH event.
* Met Hement Mehta (proof located to the left)
*Hubby came to one of my wierd events and enjoyed himself
*Lots of Geeks and Engineers at this event.... hmmmm.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Killing Two Birds with One Stone!
So one thing I love to do is keep up with my shows on hulu.com , however that is not the healthiest activity... duh! So now I am trying something new... I am doing the 5 minute workouts available at MSN.com. They are easy, and can be done while watching TV. Not to mention they fit my attention span. Seriously - one of the reasons I don't like to work out is that it bores me! haha
Monday, February 22, 2010
Questions on Love and Dating
My Answers from Matt's (The Church of No People's Blog) "Love" survey
When did you start dating?
My parents had the "16" rule, not that I had any big drama to contest this. Though I went stag to my Freshman Formal - but so did all my friends.
Did you have a "must have" list for a spouse?
Nothing too formal, but I did always want someone who was smart and somewhat nerdy. My husband is a programmer and a phenomenal Chess player - so I got it!
How did you know he/she was the one?
I could probably write a whole post on why I knew My Hubby was made for me... though I believe there is more than one person that can work for you - I think finding one of the ones that works is still very difficult.
But here goes:
He wanted a familty, He pursued self-improvement, He was successful, He desired to find truth, and most of all he wanted me for what was on the inside. You see - I come in a fairly pretty package (I'm not a knock out or anything), and a lot of guys can't/don't get past the exterior. While it's always fun to have a certain sort of attention; I have a brain too people! I know "visual" is a big deal - but I've always loved my husband for seeing more of me. He's also very progressive, and would be fine with me having an awesome career (in fact: encourages it!). Nothing he does makes me feel like I need to be the "typical wife."
What do you do to annoy your spouse?
forget my keys! and I do it ALL the time
Who do you know that's divorced?
I feel like the answer is "too many people"... but at the same time I know that divorce can be a unwanted solution to MUCH bigger problems. I guess it's still pretty sad though, and I don't wish it on anybody.
Did you (or do you) have a list of what you're looking for in a mate?
I've had lists - I believe at one time it included "Packer Fan." My husband doesn't know what Football is, so this is pretty funny.
When did you start dating?
My parents had the "16" rule, not that I had any big drama to contest this. Though I went stag to my Freshman Formal - but so did all my friends.
Did you have a "must have" list for a spouse?
Nothing too formal, but I did always want someone who was smart and somewhat nerdy. My husband is a programmer and a phenomenal Chess player - so I got it!
How did you know he/she was the one?
I could probably write a whole post on why I knew My Hubby was made for me... though I believe there is more than one person that can work for you - I think finding one of the ones that works is still very difficult.
But here goes:
He wanted a familty, He pursued self-improvement, He was successful, He desired to find truth, and most of all he wanted me for what was on the inside. You see - I come in a fairly pretty package (I'm not a knock out or anything), and a lot of guys can't/don't get past the exterior. While it's always fun to have a certain sort of attention; I have a brain too people! I know "visual" is a big deal - but I've always loved my husband for seeing more of me. He's also very progressive, and would be fine with me having an awesome career (in fact: encourages it!). Nothing he does makes me feel like I need to be the "typical wife."
What do you do to annoy your spouse?
forget my keys! and I do it ALL the time
Who do you know that's divorced?
I feel like the answer is "too many people"... but at the same time I know that divorce can be a unwanted solution to MUCH bigger problems. I guess it's still pretty sad though, and I don't wish it on anybody.
Did you (or do you) have a list of what you're looking for in a mate?
I've had lists - I believe at one time it included "Packer Fan." My husband doesn't know what Football is, so this is pretty funny.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Barbie is now an Engineer!
The Article
I generally think this is good news! as Barbie has been a doctor and a pilot, but has yet to find herself in the remaining male dominated field of engineering. Though she is a Computer Engineer as opposed to a Manufacturing Engineer (which would of course be better hint: that's my degree)... I use to be a camp counselor at an ALL GIRLS engineering camp and this totally think this fits one of the components which is " you can be cute and smart". Usually I am not a big fan of Barbie - as I think she boasts an unobtainable standard of looks and I have been quoted as saying "my (future) children will never own a Barbie". However, this seems a positive direction for her, also because of a recent conference I attended where it was suggested that one issue with lack of female representation in Engineering and Design fields is lack of role models. So despite my feelings about Barbie - she has been an icon - and therefore will continue to be role model for young girls whether we like it or not. I guess this gives me a bit of hope for future generations of girls.... amongst all the sex icons there is a bit of a silver lining.
How do you feel about Barbie and her 125+ careers?
I generally think this is good news! as Barbie has been a doctor and a pilot, but has yet to find herself in the remaining male dominated field of engineering. Though she is a Computer Engineer as opposed to a Manufacturing Engineer (which would of course be better hint: that's my degree)... I use to be a camp counselor at an ALL GIRLS engineering camp and this totally think this fits one of the components which is " you can be cute and smart". Usually I am not a big fan of Barbie - as I think she boasts an unobtainable standard of looks and I have been quoted as saying "my (future) children will never own a Barbie". However, this seems a positive direction for her, also because of a recent conference I attended where it was suggested that one issue with lack of female representation in Engineering and Design fields is lack of role models. So despite my feelings about Barbie - she has been an icon - and therefore will continue to be role model for young girls whether we like it or not. I guess this gives me a bit of hope for future generations of girls.... amongst all the sex icons there is a bit of a silver lining.
How do you feel about Barbie and her 125+ careers?
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
LOST GEEK - Right here!
I got hooked on Lost a little late in the game via my hubby. Before that I didn't care much for TV that wasn't centered around humor - anyway somehow I am now roped in.
In any case you have not seen LOST
yet - catch up here!
If you have seen LOST then follow the link anyway -because it's actually funnier if you have seen it - I think. Because it smartly mocks the often psychotic plot lines found in the show.
In any case you have not seen LOST
yet - catch up here! If you have seen LOST then follow the link anyway -because it's actually funnier if you have seen it - I think. Because it smartly mocks the often psychotic plot lines found in the show.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
I was an unpopular Cheerleader... or recognition and if it matters.
1) I was on the "Hockey"squad. Despite the fact that I lived in the "Hockey State" and despite the fact that Hockey is awesome! - this was not the cool squad to be on. (Correct Answer: Basketball)
2) As I mentioned earlier I lived (and live) in the Hockey State (Minnesota). Cheerleading wasn't nearly the thing it is in the South. And at my school - it was even less of a thing. (Though it is a thing there now). Needless to say it wasn't a free ride to the A class.
It mattered to me then that I wasn't cool, and it bothered me that I couldn't just fix it my joining a "sport". As time as gone - the desire to be "popular" has pretty much diminished entirely from my life. In college I was recognized, and had a vast circle of friends. I even partied with the cheerleaders! lol. When I graduated I thought this sort of recognition might continue - and to a great extent the experience has given me the confidence to be myself regardless. However, I felt there was a similar sort of "high-school" social system at the last place I worked. It was awkward because I had grown past any need to play "social games", but at times I still felt a sense of being an outcast. Some of the same insecurities I had in high-school cropped up from time to time and it made me feel helpless. As soon as I left most of those feelings were gone. Problem solved.
Not quite - I'm left with a scared feeling that whatever high-school awkwardness, uncoolness, insecurites? aren't gone, but just minimized by environment. Do you think that how we were treated in highschool affects who we are? Should it?
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Twittering
So I have decided to tread a little deeper into the world of twitter - For those of you who are in the big leagues is there anything I need to know? and... oh yeah - follow me! Thanks.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Babbler!
I am a talkative individual. No matter the topic I find a personal antidote from my life to babble on and on about. I have great friends who are great listeners, but unfortunately I know that the all to commonly the situation occurs where I am over powering the conversation and demanding constant attention to my life.
I have a couple theories as to why this is:
1) I am loathsome and selfish. I actually don't think this is true, but I am familiar with my Strengths, as everyone should be (sorry for the plug). But anyhow three of my top five are: Input, Ideation and Significance. That's like a triple whammy for HAS A BIG MOUTH. Or in other words I am someone who has lots of ideas, needs to share them, and desires to be important (errr hmmm....).
2) I was raised with supportive, but demanding parents. My parents wanted to know everything about my life. (and I DO MEAN EVERYTHING!) In fact, I'm 25 and I still think they want to know everything. That being said - for most of my life I told them everything. I couldn't just say I'll be out late, I had to qualify that. I knew that everything I did and said needed to be "explained". They were willing to listen - but I've come to realize that not everyone else needs that level of explanation from me. I can't just say "I'll have a hamburger" -- I have to say " I'll have a hamburger, because I know for a fact that these particular hamburgers are low calorie, and I really do enjoy the taste of beef, don't worry I agree grass fed is better, and by no means am I trying to disrespect the vegan population". One might assume here that this level of explanation is a bit exhausting, and one might be right.
3)A recent article in "Real Simple" magazine suggest that "lack of a proper outlet" and by this they mean "friends" may the core reason for "The Talker". Well, there might be some truth to this - Friend Time and Friend Count have both been declining variables since college. Also, I move out of my old chruch community, and while the interactions I was having there weren't always the highest quality - they were at least interactions. Also, I lost my job a few months ago, and while that job was mostly a stressful God-forsaken experience - I did have people to talk to there.
What's to come of all this - well I'm going to start posting more, which will mean not being as perfectionist about it. I write a lot of stuff and then I leave it in draft mode. Also, I start a new job monday that will require a lot of talking. So maybe I will find a balance soon. The last couple friend dates I've had have been pretty much me dumping my entire life onto them as fast and as ruthlessly as possible.
I have a couple theories as to why this is:
1) I am loathsome and selfish. I actually don't think this is true, but I am familiar with my Strengths, as everyone should be (sorry for the plug). But anyhow three of my top five are: Input, Ideation and Significance. That's like a triple whammy for HAS A BIG MOUTH. Or in other words I am someone who has lots of ideas, needs to share them, and desires to be important (errr hmmm....).
2) I was raised with supportive, but demanding parents. My parents wanted to know everything about my life. (and I DO MEAN EVERYTHING!) In fact, I'm 25 and I still think they want to know everything. That being said - for most of my life I told them everything. I couldn't just say I'll be out late, I had to qualify that. I knew that everything I did and said needed to be "explained". They were willing to listen - but I've come to realize that not everyone else needs that level of explanation from me. I can't just say "I'll have a hamburger" -- I have to say " I'll have a hamburger, because I know for a fact that these particular hamburgers are low calorie, and I really do enjoy the taste of beef, don't worry I agree grass fed is better, and by no means am I trying to disrespect the vegan population". One might assume here that this level of explanation is a bit exhausting, and one might be right.
3)A recent article in "Real Simple" magazine suggest that "lack of a proper outlet" and by this they mean "friends" may the core reason for "The Talker". Well, there might be some truth to this - Friend Time and Friend Count have both been declining variables since college. Also, I move out of my old chruch community, and while the interactions I was having there weren't always the highest quality - they were at least interactions. Also, I lost my job a few months ago, and while that job was mostly a stressful God-forsaken experience - I did have people to talk to there.
What's to come of all this - well I'm going to start posting more, which will mean not being as perfectionist about it. I write a lot of stuff and then I leave it in draft mode. Also, I start a new job monday that will require a lot of talking. So maybe I will find a balance soon. The last couple friend dates I've had have been pretty much me dumping my entire life onto them as fast and as ruthlessly as possible.
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